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Posts: 32892
Location: Rhinelander, Wisconsin | A little truth and humor in this one.
How Not To Be “That Guy” When Invited On a Friend’s Boat
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Posts: 1405
Location: Detroit River | I'll need to tag my buddy because items 3, 4, 5 ,6, 9, & 10 apply to him. |
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Posts: 78
| Over the years there has been several "friends" I stopped taking because of some of these things. i had one guy tell me once that I was going anyway so what's the big deal. Used to take another guy who never chipped in for gas or bring any drinks for himself or to share so I just stopped taking him. Long story short, he bought a boat, invited me to go along one morning & first thing we stop at a gas station & he hits me for money for gas. I was somewhat shocked! Since dealing with several cheapskates I basically have a 3 strikes & you're out. But it varies. The older I've gotten the less tolerant I've become of free loaders. |
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Posts: 8789
| I was "that guy"...
The first time a buddy took me out musky fishing he gave me very specific requirements for "catering". Ham sandwich on rye with dijon mustard. lettuce and swiss cheese, Shaved Krakus ham, baked chips (not fried), chocolate chip or oatmeal cookies, lime gatorade, and Claussen Kosker pickles. "WTF. REALLY?! We've going FISHING. We're not going to EAT!" Begrudgingly, I made all the crap and packed the cooler...
Until that day I bringing food would never have crossed my mind. I used to take a can of nuts, a bag of beef jerky, a few breakfast bars and a 12 pack on a weekend trip. Then I went on a trip with a few buddies. They brought hot dogs, beans, paper plates, buns, plastic silverware, and condiments! Holy crap, a meal! First trip to Canada my buddy brought ribs and potatoes and steaks and corn. I brought a can of soup.
How times change, eh? Now we pack a huge cooler for a two day trip, complete with bottles of wine, cheese, wine glasses, snacks, meals, desserts, breakfast, lunch and dinner... I'll admit, most of that is Samantha, but if anyone ever pulls up next to us and says "pardon me, do you have any grey Poupon?" I'll actually be able to say "why YES, we DO!"
But then I'm one of those guys who keeps bottled water and MRE's in my truck so I might be a little nuts...
Edited by esoxaddict 4/26/2017 8:24 PM
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Posts: 5193
| That is because your boat never is more than 20 feet from your fridge.Hopefully its different this season. |
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Posts: 16632
Location: The desert | 0723 - 4/26/2017 8:35 PM
That is because your boat never is more than 20 feet from your fridge.Hopefully its different this season.
I literally laughed out loud at this. Well done. |
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| I liked the gas card idea. I have offered cash to help with gas and got "thanks, that's ok". I think folks might feel better about accepting a gas card, plus it will be obvious you gave it some thought and really do want to help with cost. |
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Posts: 735
Location: Apparently where the Muskie aren't | Think I might send this to people and have them sign a "terms and conditions" agreement. |
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Posts: 20229
Location: oswego, il | Why not just pay half? Thats what we do, a rough cut not down to the penny. Pretty fair.
As a boat owner, i keep handi wipes in the boat. Handle your junk, here is a handi wipe before you start immediately handling all the food in the boat! |
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Posts: 688
Location: Already Gone | Great article, I think we've all met "that guy" if you've been in this long enough.
My sympathy has always gone out to those guides out there who get "that guy" several times a month. Maybe more. I don't know how you do it.
I'd like to add #12 to the list:
Don't pass massive amounts of ridiculously all-time bad gas unless the wind is right so to blow the stink away from other passengers and/or the captain. Not funny. At all.
No matter how proud you are of the stench.
And #13:
Don't complain about the lake chosen by the captain when all you do is sit on your ash and play with your sucker and pass massive amounts of all-time bad gas. When the captain explains why it's really productive to cast while late Fall live bait fishing, and he has had several very nice fish from said lake to prove his point, don't complain if you refuse to cast. Never say we should have gone to THAT lake.....or THAT lake instead... Ever. |
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Posts: 13688
Location: minocqua, wi. | only thing that makes me crazy is throwing your crap all over the place. if it can't be stowed, don't bring it. if you throw your hat, jacket, gloves, glasses etc... into my windshield area or on my seat, i may go effing nuts. people who don't look around and realize that when under power, stuff can fly out of the boat completely blow my mind. it's ok for you to participate in the world around you and anticipate potential problems and it's equally ok to elminate the potential by putting your crap away.
i fish alone or with my dog a lot. |
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Posts: 568
Location: Lake St Clair | Zib - 4/26/2017 3:26 PM
I'll need to tag my buddy because items 3, 4, 5 ,6, 9, & 10 apply to him.
Hope this isnt me, haha
35 more days, i cant wait. ill keep in touch when it gets closer. |
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Posts: 625
Location: S.W. WI | jonnysled - 4/27/2017 8:20 AM
. it's ok for you to participate in the world around you and anticipate potential problems and it's equally ok to elminate the potential by putting your crap away.
i fish alone or with my dog a lot.
Right on!! Now that's funny, and true.
Sled, I enjoy your wisdom.
Edited by Rudedog 4/27/2017 9:50 AM
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Posts: 1405
Location: Detroit River | mastical - 4/27/2017 10:36 AM Zib - 4/26/2017 3:26 PM I'll need to tag my buddy because items 3, 4, 5 ,6, 9, & 10 apply to him. Hope this isnt me, haha35 more days, i cant wait. ill keep in touch when it gets closer. |
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| jonnysled - 4/27/2017 8:20 AM
only thing that makes me crazy is throwing your crap all over the place. if it can't be stowed, don't bring it. if you throw your hat, jacket, gloves, glasses etc... into my windshield area or on my seat, i may go effing nuts. people who don't look around and realize that when under power, stuff can fly out of the boat completely blow my mind. it's ok for you to participate in the world around you and anticipate potential problems and it's equally ok to elminate the potential by putting your crap away.
i fish alone or with my dog a lot.
First time I fished with one of my nephews, I realized his boat didn't have a lot of storage so I took everything I thought I would need, rain jacket, water bottles, sun glasses, snacks, etc., and either packed it into or strapped on top of the large, soft sided tackle box I use. He thought that was a good way to take care of the storage issue and keep my crap out of our way. He now has a bigger boat with a lot more storage space and I handle it a little differently. Smaller tackle box, store everything else out of the way where it works for him. I have noticed when boats come past my house, a lot of guys have their stuff in back packs.
But however you deal with it, folks need to respect the host's desire to keep their boat neat and hazard free. |
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Posts: 833
| My favorite is a friend of mine who tells me he wants me to take him fishing, but then informs me we can't go musky fishing because it is too boring. For some reason he hasn't been out with me for awhile... |
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Posts: 239
Location: Elroy, Wisconsin | More behavior issues.
1. Banging lures into the side of your 50K boat
2. Dragging sand in when you board
3. Never shut up
4. Casting in front of the boat owner so he is cut off
5. Never try to catch the dock the when coming in
6. suggesting switching to walleyes or bass when musky fishing
7. Always having to take a leak when it is time to pay for gas
8. Leave lures all over the boat
9. Leave garbage in my boat
10. And finally, wanting to try another spot after 3-4 casts
Those things get to me and a sure ticket to not getting invited back |
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Posts: 5193
| number 4 casting in front from back.i agree annoying
Edited by 0723 4/29/2017 6:07 PM
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Posts: 78
| Another pet peeve.... taking weeds off of their lure, throwing some of the weeds back into the lake but always leave some in the floor of the boat. Really? You can't see the weeds you just threw in the floor? Burns me up ever time. |
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Posts: 1416
Location: oconomowoc, wi | DBJr - 5/2/2017 8:55 PM
Another pet peeve.... taking weeds off of their lure, throwing some of the weeds back into the lake but always leave some in the floor of the boat. Really? You can't see the weeds you just threw in the floor? Burns me up ever time.
nice tryin to clean em off when its 85 and sunny and they get cooked to the fiberglass or carpet huh? |
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Location: Apparently where the Muskie aren't | DBJr - 5/2/2017 8:55 PM
Another pet peeve.... taking weeds off of their lure, throwing some of the weeds back into the lake but always leave some in the floor of the boat. Really? You can't see the weeds you just threw in the floor? Burns me up ever time.
Let a friend borrow a bulldawg and somehow it went back into the tackle box with weeds wrapped all around it. Made a mess of the tackle bag, had to take everything out and stick the hose in it. And you'd be surprised how hard it is to get dried weeds off a bulldawg. |
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Location: oswego, il | Sometimes the back of my boat looks like somebody made a giant salad. That and food garbage left in it. |
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Posts: 269
| Howdy,
Here's another one that I can't stand, asking to borrow a lure from my tackle box, but then taking the brand new one as opposed to one that has already been used. Unless you're family (and even that is pushing it) no-one breaks a cherry on a new bait before the captain does.
Take care,
Ruddiger
PS-and don't even get me started on hitting the motor on a backcast after being REPEATEDLY reminded NOT to do that!!!
Edited by Ruddiger 5/3/2017 7:29 AM
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Location: Ashland WI | DBJr - 5/2/2017 8:55 PM
Another pet peeve.... taking weeds off of their lure, throwing some of the weeds back into the lake but always leave some in the floor of the boat. Really? You can't see the weeds you just threw in the floor? Burns me up ever time.
Weeds in the boat is a big one for me as well.
Also, I tend to be pretty neat when I fish, so I don't like when someone leaves clutter (coffee, lures, snacks, etc.) all over the boat. |
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Posts: 239
Location: Elroy, Wisconsin | I have noticed over the years that slobs in my boat are usually poor fishermen. The guys and gals that leave neater than when they came aboard are usually very good musky fishermen and never complain.
Mudpuppy |
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Posts: 8789
| Many many things...
What bugs me more than anything is when you ask someone not to do something (like stand in the middle of the front deck so I can't see the head of the trolling motor, or repeatedly toss your pile of salad in the exact spot where it fouls my lure while I'm working a fish) and they just keep doing it.
You have to figure that most of the time they just didn't know. And that's fine. But when you see me standing there not throwing a cast because your line is out in front of me for the third time this morning?
Here's a good one: Throwing another cast while I've got a fish hooked. I don't know why, I just figured that when you heard "whoosh*, felt the boat rock, and saw my rod doubled over it would have crossed your mind to stop casting and get the ****in' net... |
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Posts: 105
Location: Jane Lew, WV | It doesn't really bother me so much but a buddy of mine comes fishing and will sit down for around 15 mins out of each hour. Totally pointless.
Another likes to figure-8 eight to ten times whether a fish is there or not. It gets in the way sometimes when I try to time it so our 8's aren't running into each other.
Talking. Too much talking from basically everyone. Annoys the crud out of me. Just fish dangit! |
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Posts: 815
Location: Waukee, IA | darbogast90 - 5/3/2017 1:21 PM
It doesn't really bother me so much but a buddy of mine comes fishing and will sit down for around 15 mins out of each hour. Totally pointless.
Another likes to figure-8 eight to ten times whether a fish is there or not. It gets in the way sometimes when I try to time it so our 8's aren't running into each other.
Talking. Too much talking from basically everyone. Annoys the crud out of me. Just fish dangit!
It sounds like you just dislike other people. Have you considered fishing alone? |
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Posts: 1516
| Yes, what is this world coming to when a guy takes a 15 minute break every hour. Let's face it if you aren't on a 12 to 16 hour death march every time you go Muskie fishing well, what's the point of going at all? |
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Location: Lake Country, Wisconsin | maybe if you put the guy on more fish, he wouldn't have to sit down all the time? |
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Location: Smith Creek | You know what annoys me? When someone invites me to join them in their boat and then get peeed every time i fart or cough or have a smoke or accidentally drop a weed in the boat or don't clean all the sand off my shoes or don't pony up for their lunch or pay for 2 weeks of their gas.
Don't people fish with each other because they enjoy the company anymore? Take the good with the bad?
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Posts: 8789
| Sometimes the most enjoyable part of fishing is the fact that there is nobody else around... |
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Posts: 5193
| Flambeauski - 5/3/2017 3:10 PM
You know what annoys me? When someone invites me to join them in their boat and then get peeed every time i fart or cough or have a smoke or accidentally drop a weed in the boat or don't clean all the sand off my shoes or don't pony up for their lunch or pay for 2 weeks of their gas.
Don't people fish with each other because they enjoy the company anymore? Take the good with the bad?
Yes very anal.I would bet most the anals are divorced too ,and it was the ex's fault.Flambeau another good post as usual. |
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| Flambeauski - 5/3/2017 3:10 PM
You know what annoys me? When someone invites me to join them in their boat and then get peeed every time i fart or cough or have a smoke or accidentally drop a weed in the boat or don't clean all the sand off my shoes or don't pony up for their lunch or pay for 2 weeks of their gas.
Don't people fish with each other because they enjoy the company anymore? Take the good with the bad?
As I read some of the posts, I thought the same thing: Don't you invite people because you enjoy their company? This is fishing, not brain surgery. I understand being organized, and keeping the decks that way but sheesh, lighten up folks. Life is short. |
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Posts: 221
| This is a long list that reminds me how much I love being out alone on the lake. No one to be concerned about except yourself. Until you catch a fish. |
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Posts: 167
Location: Tomahawk, WI | I went on a short trip the other day with "That Guy". It was just a day trip but the other guy broke just about all the rules. First, he wasn't late, but when I woke up an let the dogs out he was standing in my back yard smoking an hour before I told him to be there. We get to the lake that day and no glasses and no sunscreen. Thats Ok, I keep extra in the boat. While we are out fishing he is on his phone constantly. While we are talking he doesn't believe a dam thing I say and has to google everything to fact check me. Starting to get annoyed at this point. This is the first week of the season, so small twitch baits, gliders, and small bucks should be the lures right? Nope, he wants to throw cowgirls and BIG topwater. I'm OK with that . whatever trips your trigger man. Ill just focus on actually catching a fish. Now its time for lunch. There a nice looking bar, we'll go there. No offer to buy a drink for the guy whos boat you've been fishing out of all day. not even an offer to leave a big tip, just pays his bill and and back to the boat. Really annoyed now!!! Back to fishing for a few hours then pack up and head home. Takes him forever to pack up with his crap spread all over the boat. takes me about five minutes. Get to landing and we put the boat on the trailer. No offer to help get the boat ready to travel. Just sitting on a bench starring at his phone. ARRRGH!!!! On the way home now and he's sleeping about ten minutes into the ride, Thats ok until he starts snoring. We get back to my place and he unloads his stuff and leaves. No offer of gas money, no thanks for the day of fishing. Nothing!!!! Last time that joker ever steps foot in my boat!!!! |
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Location: minocqua, wi. | how many fish did you catch? |
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Posts: 78
| Some would call it "anal", I call it common courtesy & respect. Treat people & their personal property as you & yours would like to be treated. Kind of like that "Golden Rule" deal. If I've had problems or should I say repeated situations with certain "friends", they don't go with me anymore. |
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Posts: 1144
Location: Minnesota. | Flambeauski - 5/3/2017 3:10 PM
You know what annoys me? When someone invites me to join them in their boat and then get peeed every time i fart or cough or have a smoke or accidentally drop a weed in the boat or don't clean all the sand off my shoes or don't pony up for their lunch or pay for 2 weeks of their gas.
Don't people fish with each other because they enjoy the company anymore? Take the good with the bad?
I agree with most of what you said but....I got a nice boat...you should always knock the sand of your shoes when ya step into a nice rig. I do. And I vacuum my boat carpet once a season B/4 vacation with the family. A clean rig is nice.
And I don't wear shoes in my my home...or anyone else's either!
It's just respectful. |
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Posts: 239
Location: Elroy, Wisconsin | Yep, its the all a out me generation. Call it anal, but the money we have invested in boats and equipment, sheeesh. I Like Jeremy's attitude.
Mudpuppy |
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Posts: 239
Location: Elroy, Wisconsin | Yep, its the all a out me generation. Call it anal, but the money we have invested in boats and equipment, sheeesh. I Like Jeremy's attitude.
Mudpuppy |
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Posts: 2024
| Instead of complaining about excessive flatulence, why not just keep some Beano in your rig?
Yes, I am sponsored by Beano. Hope this doesn't violate the board's posting policies. |
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Posts: 105
Location: Jane Lew, WV | I don't hate everyone, that came off way too harsh, though, didn't it? I am misunderstood and that is okay. All I'm getting at is that I don't care for one to complain that they aren't seeing any, when they haven't been doing much. That's all. |
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Posts: 5193
| I think most here should fish by themselves..If I ask someone to go I don't expect them to pay .If they feel like offering money or food ,fine. If they don't thats ok too.Sand in your boat bothers you?Keep it in the garage like one famous board member here does to keepit well preserved from that guy.Alot of you here sound like that girl, not a hardcore musky angler. |
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Location: 31 | I've noticed that most slobs call people who like to stay reasonably clean and organized "anal". I personally don't care about a little sand in my boat, same with weeds or stuff laying around when in use... but I do like to stay more organized than most. Yesterday, while walking into a customers high-end home I noticed that he took off his shoes, I followed suit and took mine off... was easy enough to follow his lead even though I don't normally take my shoes off in my own house. IMHO boat guests being lazy about putting stuff away, or not spending 30 seconds to clean sand or mud from their shoes is simply bad form IMHO. I also consider it rude when somebody doesn't make a reasonable offer to share expenses. Now, it doesn't necessarily mean I will accept, but for some clown to think that just because I invited them to go fishing they are entitled to a free roll is wrong on so many levels it would be an effort in futility to try to explain it to "that guy". |
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Posts: 470
Location: Blaine, MN | Then isn't it reasonable to say the failure is in the question when some people are expecting a monetary donation towards the trip?
Shouldn't the dialogue read "Do you want to split expenses with me on a fishing trip?"
rather than...
"Do you want to go fishing with me?"
Just me, but if I invite someone out to dinner, it isn't so they pick up their half of the check.
Edited by short STRIKE 5/18/2017 2:35 PM
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| I wonder if the tables are ever turned, where a neat organized guy is invited to fish in a boat where the owner throws everything from empty beer cans to sandwich wrappers in the bottom of the boat and doesn't pick up between trips.
I thought of this because of a guy I had contact with at the boat landing as a clean water volunteer. It was about ten years ago and a lot of people had questions about why we were there. Most were great when we explained and gave them some literature about invasive species. One guy I talked to twice would swear a blue streak, say he didn't have time, even though most people just answered while readying the boat. He had a seasonal site at a nearby campground and came up on weekends. His boat looked like the other campers had used it as a dumpster during the week, with empty beer and soda cans, a bunch of empty cigarette packs, candy bar wrappers, and assorted other trash covering pretty much every flat surface. I sincerely have no idea how he walked around in there without stumbling, tripping. Had I been invited to fish in a boat like that, I think I would have been grabbing the nearest plastic bag and tossing stuff in. Apparently he didn't have time to pick anything up, in addition to not having time to speak to us. |
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Posts: 8789
| I think you can tell a lot about a person by looking at the inside of their boat, or the inside of their truck. If they don't care enough about their own environment to keep it looking decent, they're likely not going to give other people much consideration either. |
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Location: 31 | short STRIKE - 5/18/2017 2:32 PM Then isn't it reasonable to say the failure is in the question when some people are expecting a monetary donation towards the trip? Shouldn't the dialogue read "Do you want to split expenses with me on a fishing trip?" rather than... "Do you want to go fishing with me?" Just me, but if I invite someone out to dinner, it isn't so they pick up their half of the check. Yep, I think it's still bad form not to “offer” something when invited, even if it's just lunch or dinner. Again, it doesn't necessarily mean it has to be accepted, it's just proper etiquette for some of us along the lines of bringing the hostess a gift when invited over to someone's house party.
Getting back to inviting somebody to go fishing, I think we're talking apples and oranges here because some of us have to travel long distances to fish, at least that's my frame of reference. If you're talking about meeting somebody at a local boat ramp for a day on water, I tend to agree... but I would still bring a gift lure… or something for the boat as a thank you. Maybe that's just me?
However, keep in mind that when some of us ask someone else if they want to go fishing, it's a trip of hundreds of miles and for a long weekend. Now if you jump into a vehicle with the boat and gear ready to go, travel hundreds of miles, and then don't offer anything along the way… well, I’d guess that would be the one and only invitation for most of us reading this.
A quick review of the original post of “how not to be that guy”. “Oh and if you get invited out regularly, offer to chip in for gas. A gas station gift card is the easy way to make this happen.” |
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Posts: 5193
| Most of you should fish from shore.Besides being anal you're cheap too. |
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Posts: 470
Location: Blaine, MN | Jerry Newman - 5/18/2017 8:11 PM
short STRIKE - 5/18/2017 2:32 PM Then isn't it reasonable to say the failure is in the question when some people are expecting a monetary donation towards the trip? Shouldn't the dialogue read "Do you want to split expenses with me on a fishing trip?" rather than... "Do you want to go fishing with me?" Just me, but if I invite someone out to dinner, it isn't so they pick up their half of the check. Yep, I think it's still bad form not to “offer” something when invited, even if it's just lunch or dinner. Again, it doesn't necessarily mean it has to be accepted, it's just proper etiquette for some of us along the lines of bringing the hostess a gift when invited over to someone's house party.
Getting back to inviting somebody to go fishing, I think we're talking apples and oranges here because some of us have to travel long distances to fish, at least that's my frame of reference. If you're talking about meeting somebody at a local boat ramp for a day on water, I tend to agree... but I would still bring a gift lure… or something for the boat as a thank you. Maybe that's just me?
However, keep in mind that when some of us ask someone else if they want to go fishing, it's a trip of hundreds of miles and for a long weekend. Now if you jump into a vehicle with the boat and gear ready to go, travel hundreds of miles, and then don't offer anything along the way… well, I’d guess that would be the one and only invitation for most of us reading this.
A quick review of the original post of “how not to be that guy”. “Oh and if you get invited out regularly, offer to chip in for gas. A gas station gift card is the easy way to make this happen.”
I'm picking up what you're laying down, and I tend to follow the same etiquette guidelines as yourself... All I am saying is that not everyone has the same social mentalities, experiences, or history. Some people may not realize that it is proper procedure to offer some type of assistance in the days expenses, or a "gift lure" to show appreciation. And that is where my point is coming from... If some type of "cost sharing" is expected then it is the responsibility of the inviting party to make that known ahead of time. |
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| Jerry Newman - 5/18/2017 8:11 PM
short STRIKE - 5/18/2017 2:32 PM Then isn't it reasonable to say the failure is in the question when some people are expecting a monetary donation towards the trip? Shouldn't the dialogue read "Do you want to split expenses with me on a fishing trip?" rather than... "Do you want to go fishing with me?" Just me, but if I invite someone out to dinner, it isn't so they pick up their half of the check. Yep, I think it's still bad form not to “offer” something when invited, even if it's just lunch or dinner. Again, it doesn't necessarily mean it has to be accepted, it's just proper etiquette for some of us along the lines of bringing the hostess a gift when invited over to someone's house party.
Getting back to inviting somebody to go fishing, I think we're talking apples and oranges here because some of us have to travel long distances to fish, at least that's my frame of reference. If you're talking about meeting somebody at a local boat ramp for a day on water, I tend to agree... but I would still bring a gift lure… or something for the boat as a thank you. Maybe that's just me?
However, keep in mind that when some of us ask someone else if they want to go fishing, it's a trip of hundreds of miles and for a long weekend. Now if you jump into a vehicle with the boat and gear ready to go, travel hundreds of miles, and then don't offer anything along the way… well, I’d guess that would be the one and only invitation for most of us reading this.
A quick review of the original post of “how not to be that guy”. “Oh and if you get invited out regularly, offer to chip in for gas. A gas station gift card is the easy way to make this happen.”
Certainly, if you are traveling several hundred miles and overnight, what you expect from an invited guest would be different than someone coming out for an afternoon on a local lake but still seems reasonable to let them know ahead of time what your expectations are as far as cost sharing. |
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Location: 31 | Point taken and maybe explaining expectations to the inexperienced is more warranted than I first thought, especially first timers. However, I'm still of the opinion that there's kind of an unwritten mutual understanding between more experienced anglers that costs ect. will be shared. IMHO even if it's just a day on the water, the invited guest should at least “offer” to pick up lunch or something as previously mentioned in this thread.
On a slightly different front but along the same lines; what about a guest who stupidly breaks something expensive, loses an expensive lure, or loses a rod/reel over the side? Should this potential expense be explained before the trip too? It's my opinion if you break something you should pay for it, but in the real world that's obviously a slippery slope, especially for those who are clueless about what some of this stuff costs to replace.
I know a guide who had a client drop a fairly new and expensive rod/reel combination over the side. The guide told him the good news is he gets a nice discount on his tackle, the bad news is it's still $_x_, and at the end of the day his clients paid him for the trip, but only gave him the exact $_x_ to cover the rod/reel. According to my friend, they had a great time and had high praise, but questioned the charge of the “used” rod and reel. Anyway, I'm guessing most of us reading this would have paid for the rod/reel, and still tipped the guide. I’m also guessing some reading this think it was wrong for this guide to still “expect” a tip. In my world tipping is not something that a guide should ever have to explain as an “expectation”, and is along the lines of at least “offering” something when you fish out of somebody else's boat. One of those unwritten rules that shows appreciation. I had a guy trash a down east rod holder a while back, he was a newer friend but this was probably his fourth or fifth fish that trip and about our fifth trip together, he jammed on the rod like a freaking Neanderthal and bent the rod holder so bad that it was un-repairable (I still can hardly believe he didn't break the rod in two). When I informed him of the cost of a new DE (after allowing him plenty of time to pony up), he looked at me sideways and asked with a little attitude “how old was that thing”, like it was defective or something. Well, I had gotten somewhat use to him being on the lazy, unorganized, and cheap side, but that little incident was the last straw for both of us and we haven't talked since. Conversely, I had a good friend bash the side of my boat hard into the dock when he missed driving it on the trailer, and after we looked at the damage he said “get it fixed and send me the bill”. Although I told him not to worry about it, it was “the gesture” that was appreciated here, and not so much the cost of the repair. My point is this; I shouldn't have had to ask the DE guy, nor should I have had to inform him that if he ignorantly breaks something he should volunteer to pay for it.
A long time ago I hit a rock with my lower unit on Lake of the Woods and later got a check in the mail from my boat partner with a note “to help cover the cost of damage”, he did this even though it was 100% my fault. I called him and explained this, but he insisted we should share the cost. In sum; these are not the type of good character gestures you will ever get from “that guy”. I think the article is basically training wheels for "how not to be that guy” and more geared to try to help the inexperienced who might think that someone who runs a tight ship is anal, or the host expecting some type of goodwill gesture is just being cheap. Perhaps I’ve just weeded through my boat partners enough through the years, or maybe the guys I typically fish with now are not only great people, but also seasoned veterans that know enough about the expenses of maintaining and operating a boat to always “offer”. |
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Location: Minnesota. | Nice post Jerry.
I'm always amazed at the difference in people and their expectations when they use other peoples eqpt.
I don't know what some people expect but it all simply (hmmm..??) comes to being a gentleman and trying to imagine what you (they) would do if the given situation were reversed and the eqpt. were their own.
Basically it's common sense and overall decency but there-in lies the conundrum as people vary so much. Pity too because it spoils it for the rest.
"It's a strange, strange world we live in, Master Jack!"
I'd fish with ya...if I weren't so danged cheap to have to hire a guide. It'd likely pay dividends for my learning scale. But...I'm such a cheap bugger...;) 
Have a good season, man.
Jeremy. |
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| Jerry Newman - 5/21/2017 11:45 AM
Point taken and maybe explaining expectations to the inexperienced is more warranted than I first thought, especially first timers. However, I'm still of the opinion that there's kind of an unwritten mutual understanding between more experienced anglers that costs ect. will be shared. IMHO even if it's just a day on the water, the invited guest should at least “offer” to pick up lunch or something as previously mentioned in this thread.
On a slightly different front but along the same lines; what about a guest who stupidly breaks something expensive, loses an expensive lure, or loses a rod/reel over the side? Should this potential expense be explained before the trip too? It's my opinion if you break something you should pay for it, but in the real world that's obviously a slippery slope, especially for those who are clueless about what some of this stuff costs to replace.
I know a guide who had a client drop a fairly new and expensive rod/reel combination over the side. The guide told him the good news is he gets a nice discount on his tackle, the bad news is it's still $_x_, and at the end of the day his clients paid him for the trip, but only gave him the exact $_x_ to cover the rod/reel. According to my friend, they had a great time and had high praise, but questioned the charge of the “used” rod and reel. Anyway, I'm guessing most of us reading this would have paid for the rod/reel, and still tipped the guide. I’m also guessing some reading this think it was wrong for this guide to still “expect” a tip. In my world tipping is not something that a guide should ever have to explain as an “expectation”, and is along the lines of at least “offering” something when you fish out of somebody else's boat. One of those unwritten rules that shows appreciation. I had a guy trash a down east rod holder a while back, he was a newer friend but this was probably his fourth or fifth fish that trip and about our fifth trip together, he jammed on the rod like a freaking Neanderthal and bent the rod holder so bad that it was un-repairable (I still can hardly believe he didn't break the rod in two). When I informed him of the cost of a new DE (after allowing him plenty of time to pony up), he looked at me sideways and asked with a little attitude “how old was that thing”, like it was defective or something. Well, I had gotten somewhat use to him being on the lazy, unorganized, and cheap side, but that little incident was the last straw for both of us and we haven't talked since. Conversely, I had a good friend bash the side of my boat hard into the dock when he missed driving it on the trailer, and after we looked at the damage he said “get it fixed and send me the bill”. Although I told him not to worry about it, it was “the gesture” that was appreciated here, and not so much the cost of the repair. My point is this; I shouldn't have had to ask the DE guy, nor should I have had to inform him that if he ignorantly breaks something he should volunteer to pay for it.
A long time ago I hit a rock with my lower unit on Lake of the Woods and later got a check in the mail from my boat partner with a note “to help cover the cost of damage”, he did this even though it was 100% my fault. I called him and explained this, but he insisted we should share the cost. In sum; these are not the type of good character gestures you will ever get from “that guy”. I think the article is basically training wheels for "how not to be that guy” and more geared to try to help the inexperienced who might think that someone who runs a tight ship is anal, or the host expecting some type of goodwill gesture is just being cheap. Perhaps I’ve just weeded through my boat partners enough through the years, or maybe the guys I typically fish with now are not only great people, but also seasoned veterans that know enough about the expenses of maintaining and operating a boat to always “offer”. |
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| I can see not thinking about offering to pay for gas or buy lunch or whatever - that's just not thinking. But if someone throws an $800 combo overboard, it should not have to be discussed beforehand that said person would pay to replace it. Accidents happen, but if you break someone's #*#* or lose it or whatever? Wow. |
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Location: Aurora | I think bringing expectations at all to any kind of relationship, long or short term is recipe for failure.
I mean.. once you move in together, if they're spending the night somewhere else you could at least expect a call from them to let you know so you don't worry. Other than that, chalk it up to folks bein diff'rent and move on I'd say.. if yer able that is. |
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Location: The desert | I only created one rule after an outing last season. DO NOT change your bait every 5 casts, for 4-5 hours straight. Unfortunately, that is not an exaggeration. I've never seen someone change baits so many times in my whole life. I bet he changed baits more times in that short period of time than I did all season! I bet I had 3-4x as many casts as he did that day.
I don't care about much, but that new law goes into effect this season. |
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Location: oconomowoc, wi | Jeremy - 5/21/2017 1:53 PM
Nice post Jerry.
I'm always amazed at the difference in people and their expectations when they use other peoples eqpt.
I don't know what some people expect but it all simply (hmmm..?? ) comes to being a gentleman and trying to imagine what you (they ) would do if the given situation were reversed and the eqpt. were their own.
Basically it's common sense and overall decency but there-in lies the conundrum as people vary so much. Pity too because it spoils it for the rest.
"It's a strange, strange world we live in, Master Jack!"
I'd fish with ya...if I weren't so danged cheap to have to hire a guide. It'd likely pay dividends for my learning scale. But...I'm such a cheap bugger...; )
Have a good season, man.
Jeremy.
4 Jacks and a Jill? 1967. good tunes! |
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Location: Minnesota | I'm with you Jerry. It looks like the Board has figured out who "that guy" is too. |
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| Pointerpride102 - 5/21/2017 7:58 PM
I only created one rule after an outing last season. DO NOT change your bait every 5 casts, for 4-5 hours straight. Unfortunately, that is not an exaggeration. I've never seen someone change baits so many times in my whole life. I bet he changed baits more times in that short period of time than I did all season! I bet I had 3-4x as many casts as he did that day.
I don't care about much, but that new law goes into effect this season. So far Flambeau and pointer look like decent folks to fish with .How about the captain pulling up to a spot for 4 or 5 casts?I see a spot where zero casts made it in the water before too.We laughed at that one.
Edited by 0723 5/21/2017 8:44 PM
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| esoxaddict - 5/21/2017 4:15 PM
I can see not thinking about offering to pay for gas or buy lunch or whatever - that's just not thinking. But if someone throws an $800 combo overboard, it should not have to be discussed beforehand that said person would pay to replace it. Accidents happen, but if you break someone's #*#* or lose it or whatever? Wow. $800 combo overboardthat is a big deal.This guy is going on about $40 down east rod holder.I have a real good friend I still fish with who didn't loosen his drag and my down east rod holder broke and ended up at the bottom of Shelbyville.I never even thought about asking him to pay for it and actually forgot about it until this post.If I was a guide I know I would not be letting clients use my $800 combo at any time. |
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| I mainly fish alone. My girls are in college and doing internships. My wife can't get away with work and elder care etc. I live in a remote area. It would be nice to have a fishing partner, however I do like the situation at present. Can quit when I want, no time constraints, more relaxing, I'm always up when trolling, never have to listen to complaints or unwanted advice, no splitting the cost, that make me the generous big spender. There are downside though I'm always the net man ! |
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| I fish alone more often than not these days. One buddy died of cancer and another of diabetes. A third is paralyzed and doesn't leave his house. I miss fishing with all of them. Life is short. Don't sweat the small stuff. Savor your time on the water with others. |
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Location: MN | Broke a down east rod holder and it wasn't from a fish? How is that even possible?
I'm pretty laid back. The only thing I can't stand is a whiny or pouty attitude. If you can't keep the PMA going no matter how the day is going you should take up bass or walleye fishing. |
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| Most stuff is just aggravating. But they guy who starts throwing stuff (literally) because someone else caught a fish and he did not? Yeah... bye. |
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| Nershi - 5/22/2017 11:37 AM
Broke a down east rod holder and it wasn't from a fish? How is that even possible?
I'm pretty laid back. The only thing I can't stand is a whiny or pouty attitude. If you can't keep the PMA going no matter how the day is going you should take up bass or walleye fishing. It was a big fish.which really sucked too. |
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| Well what about how not to be that gal???
I mean you have 5-6 ladies board your boat. Next thing they're in nothing but thong bikini bottoms asking you to rub tanning lotion on them. Then, your wasting precious casts twisting wine cooler tops off the bottles because the caps are "too tight". Next thing you know, you now have ten boats around you gawking at you on your prime spot. God help you should you catch a nice one and ask them to net it for you...assuming they even hear you through all that giggling and good times. |
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Location: oswego, il | mnmusky - 5/22/2017 1:38 PM
Well what about how not to be that gal???
I mean you have 5-6 ladies board your boat. Next thing they're in nothing but thong bikini bottoms asking you to rub tanning lotion on them. Then, your wasting precious casts twisting wine cooler tops off the bottles because the caps are "too tight". Next thing you know, you now have ten boats around you gawking at you on your prime spot. God help you should you catch a nice one and ask them to net it for you...assuming they even hear you through all that giggling and good times.
I would be willing to put this theory through vigorous testing. Now where to find the participants......
Edited by ToddM 5/22/2017 2:01 PM
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Location: Minnesota. | Got a grin out'a that one. A good bit back when my two sons were in their late teens I was pitching around the bay and eventually got to this newish boat, very colorful with a huge motor on the back. Guy with a beautiful and scantily clad babe in a bright bikini standing there watching her bobber.
I got closer. Kids said "Daaaad..." under their breath, as in "don't"!. Got closer yet and says to "the boat"..."Man, that's simply beautiful to see. So different to what you normally see out here. (small, poor farm area) Love the color. Yer one lucky guy let me tell ya. ----long pause......................... How many horsepower is that? "...
He proceeded to tell me about his rig...I complimented him.
Kids..."Geepers dad..." Big grin from the ol' man and we kept on fishing.
I wasn't obvious atall....:) |
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Location: Smith Creek | If only you knew how much sand she tracked into his boat! |
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Location: 31 | Nershi - 5/22/2017 11:37 AM Broke a down east rod holder and it wasn't from a fish? How is that even possible? Truth is; I have my doubts about a muskie being able to bend (let alone break a DE), even with the drag locked up.
Edited by Jerry Newman 5/22/2017 7:04 PM
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Location: Minnesota. | Flambeauski - 5/22/2017 3:11 PM
If only you knew how much sand she tracked into his boat!
Sand? What sand????...
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| Jerry Newman - 5/22/2017 6:47 PM
Nershi - 5/22/2017 11:37 AM Broke a down east rod holder and it wasn't from a fish? How is that even possible? Truth is; I have my doubts about a muskie being able to bend (let alone break a DE), even with the drag locked up. |
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| I should have saved the broken part left in the boat so you could have taken a picture next to your boot to analyze the d.e. |
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Location: Northern Illinois | Interesting thread Mr. Worrall. What's amazing to me is that what I consider second nature is so controversial it creates deep divisions among a group of what otherwise are like-minded fishermen. Maybe it's a generational thing. Count me among those who would share the load. I usually fish out of my boat with a partner, but on occasion fish out of another buddy's boat and always offer to share expenses. |
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Location: 31 | mnmusky - 5/22/2017 1:38 PM Well what about how not to be that gal??? I mean you have 5-6 ladies board your boat. Next thing they're in nothing but thong bikini bottoms asking you to rub tanning lotion on them. Then, your wasting precious casts twisting wine cooler tops off the bottles because the caps are "too tight". Next thing you know, you now have ten boats around you gawking at you on your prime spot. God help you should you catch a nice one and ask them to net it for you...assuming they even hear you through all that giggling and good times. Haha, sounds like the muskie fisherman's version of the scene from the movie Dumb and Dumber. Along those lines we used to fish an area where bikinis would regularly hang around the public pier/launch, and then jump into the cigar boats when they pulled up. We never figured out if they had this prearranged, or it was just kind of a chance meeting? It seemed like every one of these boats had a couple of bikinis on board though, so maybe the girls just come as standard equipment when you pay that much for a boat Meanwhile, we're out there out there beating our brains in for some stupid fish were going to let go anyway… maybe we should rethink this hobby? I'm guessing Horse Hunter knows where this is?
Edited by Jerry Newman 5/23/2017 10:21 AM
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| RLSea - 5/22/2017 11:25 PM
Interesting thread Mr. Worrall. What's amazing to me is that what I consider second nature is so controversial it creates deep divisions among a group of what otherwise are like-minded fishermen. Maybe it's a generational thing. Count me among those who would share the load. I usually fish out of my boat with a partner, but on occasion fish out of another buddy's boat and always offer to share expenses. I consider myself lucky to make a decent living and do not to expect people to always pay if they enjoy the sport of fishing.I apologize Newman, I dont not know his current situation.I would hope if there was a time when money was tight I would hope someone would take care of me like I have done in the past to people ,without thinking twice or batting eye.Again Newman I apologize as I do not know anything about your situation. |
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| I was telling a guy I knew about Muskie fishing, he seemed interested and asked how I caught them, I said the last few I caught while trolling. He said " I would love to go sometime with you " I invite the guy and he says " That's great, is it ok if my brother and his kid goes along " Then he says " She is three and will just fish for Sunnies" WTH hows that gonna work trolling 4+ mph. Then he says " Don't worry you won't have to change diapers " NO SH*T !!!!!! A storm blew in and we had to cancel. Last time I ask him. Not running a party boat !!!
Another time I took a guy out casting on a river system. He brought beer drank four and said how tired he was, then falls asleep. When he awoke he drank two more and said "You soon want to go in" Never again with him either !!!! Casting was too much of an effort for him, I guess. I fish alone for these reasons. I sometimes irritate myself when out fishing, but that's my fault. My wife and girls were my favorite fishing partners, we had a lot of fun.
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Location: Smith Creek | Cody - 5/24/2017 10:10 PM
Another time I took a guy out casting on a river system. He brought beer drank four and said how tired he was, then falls asleep. When he awoke he drank two more and said "You soon want to go in"
Sometimes sitting in the boat and drinking beer is more fun than fishing.
And it's been proven that napping is key to a happy and productive life. |
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| I'm all for a good cold beer just not while I'm driving or operating a boat. I doubt I could of even depended on guy #2 to be a net man ! I'd rather take a nap in a hammock not a day of invited fishing.......that's just me though.
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Location: MN | Seems like the link is broken or the article disappeared. This is a great thread.
I prefer to fish alone but sometimes, not often, I will fish three out of my boat. I don't like to but it just works out that way. A time on leech I was doing a controlled drift over a large weed bed. I instructed the guy in back to work the back area, the middle guy to work the middle and I would work the front. Simple enough. After a few minutes of drifting I noticed both guys casting towards the front. I let it go for awhile and it got almost comical. Both guys were casing almost parallel to the boat towards the front. I put an end to that by casting to the back and middle right over their lines LOL. |
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Location: Forest Lake, MN | I guess I am generally more lenient than some. Only two guys I ever said I wont invite back on my boat. One was a guy from work I didnt know that well, he showed up with nothing which was fine. I had brought a 6 pack and 2 sandwiches. Before I finished my first beer he had downed the other 5 and both sandwiches and kept complaining on how could I not bring more beer fishing, luckily it only lasted 20 or so minutes before he took a 2 hour nap. Other guy is a decent friend, he always brings a case and drinks about 20 of them himself and gets belligerent. Tried suggesting a few times that I think a 12er would be enough for an afternoon but still brought the case and got tossed. Still my bud, but not in the boat.
In general the guys that get invited out often ask if they can help when launching / loading (some I let, others not), bring beer or snacks at least half the time, and are quick with the net.
Guys that get invited to my cabin often bring at least some supplies and help with whatever yard work or end of trip clean up is needed. |
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| Cody - 5/22/2017 10:13 AM
I mainly fish alone. My girls are in college and doing internships. My wife can't get away with work and elder care etc. I live in a remote area. It would be nice to have a fishing partner, however I do like the situation at present. Can quit when I want, no time constraints, more relaxing, I'm always up when trolling, never have to listen to complaints or unwanted advice, no splitting the cost, that make me the generous big spender. There are downside though I'm always the net man !
youve had a few good ones in your boat I see....you ever need a fishing partner on a Monday I live in PA as well down by Pittsburgh see your NW not sure how far up but sounds like you in prime country up there my man...If you ever go south and want to fish let me know as well |
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How Not To Be That Guy